This is post 3 of 6 in the series “Middle Way Method”
There are a few recurring times, when we tend to look to the future, and determine we want to change. We may decide that we want to lose weight, get a better job, start a business, or any number of things. Most of these goals fail; the motivation or enthusiasm wains, and we quietly drop our goals. How then can we create goals with lasting power? What about the goals which are still important, but have since come to a halt, how do we restart them?
The Nature of Goals
Goals are created when we look into the future, and desire a result. In order to have the result we must strive for it. Once we have worked for our dream we achieve the victory. So the process is the dream, the struggle, the victory.
The Dream
The dream is the goal. It is what we want to achieve. Once we have the dream it is important to give the dream size, and texture. A well-defined goal is a goal that is much more likely to be achieved. As an example, a person may set the goal to be healthier, or they may define the same goal, in terms of how much exercise they will perform, and how many healthy meals they will eat. The first goal has no shape, there is no way to determine how much work will be required to achieve the goal.
The Struggle
The Struggle is the effort needed to achieve the goal. With a well defined goal, you should be able to gauge how much effort will be needed in order to achieve the desired result. A point that causes some goals to falter or fail is when we think a goal will take a smaller amount of effort that it actually takes. Our culture in many places has embraced the idea of instant gratification. This has caused us to see many goals as taking to much effort.
The Victory
The victory is the point at which the goal has been realized. It is important to understand that the size of the dream, struggle, and victory must match. It is impossible to have a large victory after a small struggle. or a small victory after a large struggle.
Creating Strong Goals
Creating strong goals can be accomplished with a few steps:
- Ensure that Goals Align with your core values, relationships, or roles
- Create Specific Goals
- Correctly Determine How Much Effort is Required to Fulfill the Goal
Aligning Goals to Values Roles and Relationships
When goals are aligned to our values, relationships, and roles they gain a solid foundation on which we can build them. Our values, roles, and relationships form the foundation of what is important to us. When goals are attempted which do not have a foundation on our values, roles, or relationships then they quickly fade.
Goals based on values, are our internal goals, things we want for ourselves. Goals based on our Roles often fall off after the role which generated them falls away, like goals related to your current employment. Goals based on strong relationships, can be almost as strong as our goals based on our values.
Specific Goals
Goals need to be specific, you can say I want to loose weight, get a better job, write a book, but unless you define what you mean by these things you are more likely to fail at them.
I believe that it is best to take a goal, and determine the steps necessary to accomplish your goals. In essence your goal becomes a “Project”, or a group of smaller goals. Each step then becomes a task, which you can add to your week in order to accomplish the goal.
Determine the Effort Needed to Accomplish Your Goals
In order to determine the effort needed to accomplish the goal you will need it to be specific, and well outlined, with all of the steps involved. Take a look at the effort, and the expected result. If the expected result is not a match for the effort, then either determine the correct result, which matches your goal, or decide if you need to abandon the goal, and reevaluate it. If the Victory of the goal does not match the struggle then it is not a well thought out goal, and needs to be reevaluated.
Handling Stalled or Halted Goals
When a goal has halted there are three ways to handle it:
- Drop it
- Reboot it
- Start where it was left off.
Dropping Unfinished Goals
Sometimes life changes, and goals which were important no longer are. Sometimes we hang on to goals because we do not want to let someone down. If you are not going to finish the goal, then drop it, and free your mind for other goals.
Rebooting Goals
Rebooting a goal makes sense if the processes are time sensitive, or if there is more to be gained by starting over.
Picking up where you left off.
Most often if a goal is worth completing then you can start doing the next item in the goal.
Conclusion
Goals assist us in the process of changing into who we want to become. Goals are born out of our dreams, and take effort to achieve. A well thought out goal has specific steps to accomplish, and has a well envisioned result. Sometimes our progress on our goals can slow or stop. At those times its important that we use our values, relationships, and roles to determine if we abandon, restart, or continue the goal.